Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Nurses and Their Noodles

Atticus and Caedmon had their yearly doctor's appointments this morning.

I always have a bit of an internal struggle over whether to schedule their appointments together, getting it all over with in one stressful visit, or making two separate but slightly less harrowing visits.

I usually go the rip-the-bandaid-off route and bring them in together.  Like this morning.

Atticus actually did really well, cooperating with the nurse and doctor and laughing at the silly things they did to make him feel more comfortable.

Caedmon, on the other hand, has evidently entered a let's-cling-to-mommy-and-cry-'til-everyone's-eardrums-burst stage.  We haven't had to deal with much separation anxiety with him; even at church when we drop him off in the younger two-year-olds' classroom and half its occupants are crying, he walks away from us without a backwards glance.

He didn't want to be weighed, he didn't want them to check his height or head circumference, he didn't want them looking in his ears, and he definitely didn't want them to place a stethoscope anywhere near his body.

I learned that Caedmon is surprisingly strong this morning.

We did experience a couple small hiccups in Atticus's half of the appointment; when the doctor was talking to him, one of his questions was, "And do you always wear your seatbelt when you're in the car?"

Atticus either wasn't paying attention or was engaging in wishful thinking or was just blatantly lying and replied, "No."

The doctor laughed it off and did kind of a "Hahaha, kids say crazy stuff, hahaha."

And I said, "Hahaha, we always wear our seatbelts, hahaha, no but seriously, I'm not a terrible mother, hahaha."

Which I thought resolved that little situation, until the doctor was about to leave, seemed to remember something at the last minute, turned back to us, and gave me a little lecture on child safety, paying particular attention to the importance of child safety belts in moving vehicles.

I reiterated the bit about how we always wear our seatbelts, he probably still didn't believe me, and left.

The second hiccup involved the shots Atticus had to get- one in each thigh.  He obviously had no idea what was coming, lying patiently and peacefully on the bed, perhaps wondering why I was lying across his torso, until he felt the "little pokes" (Why do nurses say that, Mom?  Those "small pinches" and "small pokes" are never nearly as benign as you people make them sound- is it because nurses can't generate any sympathy for someone unless they're dying or have lost a limb?), started screaming, yelled, "THAT WASN'T VERY NICE!" at the nurses as they left the room, but then calmed down pretty quickly after that.

I really thought we were home free as we were walking out of the office, but it seems Atticus was still nursing (har har) a bit of a grudge against the building's inhabitants; as we passed someone approaching the door, our son turned to the man, pointed back to the door, and warned him, "They're not very careful with their noodles in there."

This man was apparently used to receiving cryptic messages from preschoolers, because he just smiled and said, "Okay, thanks."

Satisfied that he had done his job, Atticus continued toward the van, while I hurried Caedmon along and resisted the urge to clarify that noodles = needles to the innocent bystander.  No need to scare anyone.

And now for family who's interested in this kind of thing (also for future me who will probably end up losing those treasured baby books someday):

Atticus: (4 years, one month)

Height:  44 inches (99th percentile)
Weight:  43.2 lbs (90th percentile)

Atticus has grown 4 inches (what is up with these Crisler genes?) over the past year and gained 4 pounds.

Caedmon:  (2 years, two months)

Height: 36 inches (81st percentile)
Weight:  33.4 lbs (90th percentile)

Caedmon has grown 6 1/2 inches (HOLY COW) over the past year and gained 11.2 pounds (which makes me laugh, because that boy is solid).


  1. I love it when adults respond nicely to kids who are only trying to help. I find it very strange that you doctor would ask Atticus about the seat belts. It made me wonder if the area you're living in has a problem with parents driving their kids around without car seats? Weird question.

    Emma has an appointment coming up and I think she's going to need a vaccine booster. I have to decide if I should tell her several days before the appointment, or at the time I pick her up from school on the day of. Either way, she's going to hate me.

    1. As for the seatbelt thing, I really don't know. We live in a relatively rural area- a small town in the middle of farm country- so I suppose it's possible.

      If Emma has any past issues with anxiety, I'd wait until that day- unless that would create trust issues.

      I'm super helpful today!

  2. There's a fine line between being honest with your patients and scaring them. I think what I usually say is "There's going to be a stick..."
    I've also noticed a common thread in visiting with my nurse/mom friends over the years. It usually goes something like this "I remember when my son/daughter fractured his/her ________(fill in the appropriate fractured bone) and I didn't take him/her to the dr for several days". I think that we don't rush to take our children to the dr for illnesses/injuries because we have this checklist in our nurse brains that we need to go through first. Increase fluids, ice, splint, wrap, etc. And ibuprofen. Ibuprofen is almost always the answer. And then, if we make it through the checklist and our child isn't better, we might consider a dr's visit. And then again, maybe not.

    And, if I recall correctly, after I did send you to the dr two days after you fractured your hand, you ended up in the same splint I already had you wearing. Plus ibuprofen. Fortunately, you didn't need any surgical intervention for your fracture.

    That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

    1. I wonder if my nurse friend Shayla (whose daughter just broke a bone in her hand/thumb) has read this comment...

  3. PS - I really cracked up at Atticus' comment "THAT WASN'T VERY NICE". Out of the mouth of babes, I guess.

    The grandma in me feels bad about him getting shots.

    The nurse in me remembers taking care of patients who spent time in iron lungs due to polio. Scary, scary, scary.

    So, thanks for taking my grandkids for their shots.

    1. I guess sticking people with needles isn't really considered to be good etiquette, but those two nurses were actually very, very nice. I love everyone at that clinic.

  4. It is good to record this stuff. I did lose my son's baby book. :-(

    And the noodles comment - too funny! I read it yesterday, and came back to read it again.

    1. I can totally see myself losing those, simply because I'm always losing (or breaking) things, and I think I'd be pretty heartbroken if I did. The blog helps with that a bit, though- I put more stories on here than I do in those.


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