Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Bravo, Mothers of 4+

This is my first week without baby J.

Remember him?  The baby I've been watching for the past six months?  Well, he finally got into a local daycare center, which means I only have our three kiddos to watch over.

Mothers of four or more children, how do you do it?

I cannot even tell you how productive I've been today (in part because it would feel too much like bragging, but mostly because I'm afraid I'd put it all out there and you guys would be like "Um, I get that much done before my morning coffee every single day of my life.  That's completely average person productivity."), with just one kid in the house this morning while Atticus was at preschool, and then only two chilluns for the past couple hours.  I mean, all five members of our family are going to be sleeping on clean sheets tonight at the same time.  That hasn't happened since around early 2006.  (I've talked to you about my low standards before, right?  Just so we're clear.)

And we only had the baby during the day, four days a week, which means I had evenings and three other days to get stuff done.  It was still overwhelming.  Seriously, mothers of four or five or God help you six, how?  Have you simply made your peace with insanity?  Do you have some sort of strange coping mechanism they secretly tell you about at the hospital or... wherever you go when you adopt?  Do you automatically qualify for membership to some hidden and unbalanced but deeply supportive cult when you get the fourth?  What?  Because I know you can't be going it alone.  It's just not possible.

Yes, I froze in panic around thirty times this morning because Oh my gosh I haven't heard baby J in a really long time and I haven't even checked on him and holy crap I bet he's not breathing but then I remembered I hadn't heard him or checked on him because he's not here.  And yes, two of our three children have shed actual tears over the past few days because they don't get to see the baby or play with him or haul him around the house like the surrogate younger brother he's become to them.  We miss him already, and the thought of me seeing him in a month or so and him not recognizing my face kind of kills me (why do babies and small children have such short memories?  Oh, so they won't remember the fifty bajillion ways you screwed up with them?  Oh, okay.  That makes sense).

But I did get to have breakfast with this guy:

You didn't know Captain America likes Raisin Bran, did you?  Or that he's dragged those Batman jammies out of the dirty clothes hamper so many times he is seriously starting to stink.  But at least his sheets are clean!

I also- in another fit of our-youngest-child-has-been-educationally-neglected- played a game with Cade involving flashcards and letter sounds.  Turns out he knows all his letters and their sounds.  Who knew?  Not his mother.  When I called Derek and told him this, he said "I know, that kid's got a big brain; that's why you've got to keep challenging him," and I was like What?  We're not done once they know letter sounds?  You mean I have to keep teaching them things?
Sometimes I think Derek's a better stay-at-home mom than I am.

In other news, and because I can't think of a good way to wrap this post up:  It's still winter.  I don't understand why.  Somebody fix this.


  1. I say "Bravo, mothers of more than 1!" Because I honestly have NO idea how you do it. Rob and I both agreed that the first one (who has always been relatively easy) was enough to dissuade us from EVER having another :-)

  2. This makes me feel better for never getting anything done. Or feeling that way at least. I even passed your blog link to a friend who has- wait for it- 7 kids- for a good laugh. S. Zielke

  3. And she got a hearty laugh out of it, too!
    S.Zielke's friend


Studies show that that people who leave comments are kind, intelligent, generous, creative, and have really nice hair.