See, the more I talk to people, the more I read, the more I interact with the world at large, the more I find that many are still operating under the delusion that school nurses spend their days sitting in their offices, just waiting for a sick kid to wander in. But the people who nominated Mom- fellow staff members, bless them- and the people who decided that she is The Best- fellow school nurses- all know better. They know about all the vision and hearing and scoliosis screenings. They know about endless blood sugar level checks (shout out to the diabetic kids), and finding someone who can speak an obscure language so you can communicate with a new family (shout out to the Chuukese), and finding some way to make CPR training entertaining for the tenth year in a row (shout out to anyone who's ever been the butt of one of my mom's jokes- it was for a good cause).
And that's not even getting into body parts being cut off because locker doors are surprisingly sharp and all the other astonishingly stupid ways middle schoolers can find to hurt themselves and each other. It's also not getting into all the grant writing for health careers classes or AEDs or any of the other things schools need but don't get funding for (in Kansas? That's basically everything.), or doing anything and everything to get parents and staff alike to make healthy choices for their kids, even if they're bound and determined to do the opposite.
|Basically my mom's job.|
Or hey, let's talk about some of the more glamorous aspects of her job. Like nit picking! I mean literal nit picking, as in picking head lice and nits out of kids' hair because apparently no one else is going to do it. And what about that time she turned to my sisters and me and informed us that we were not allowed to answer the phone because there was a crazy, negligent, borderline abusive parent harassing her for doing her job? Or if you really want to get scary- what about all the paperwork generated for everything I've just mentioned? What about that?
|"Lorri, someday you're going to be the Kansas State School Nurse of the Year. All it will take to get there is swimming through an ocean of paperwork, ignorance, and disgusting bodily fluids." "Super! Sign me up!"|