10:04 am : Arrive home after grocery shopping.
10:06 am : Haul groceries in the house while Atticus and Caedmon sit on the front porch, watching men pour cement in a hole on our street.
10:09 am : Finish bringing in food, shepherd boys into the house.
10:10 am : Atticus grabs his golf club and golf balls, goes out back to play. Caedmon watches while I begin putting refrigerated items in the fridge.
10:11 am : Hear strange sound. Closing the refrigerator door reveals Caedmon standing in the front of the pantry, holding an empty food container. He recently learned how to untwist caps, and has just celebrated by dumping a mountain of chocolate sprinkles onto the floor.
10:12 am : Help Caedmon sweep up sprinkles. Uncanny how his new-found dexterity doesn't extend to cleaning.
10:14 am : Finish putting away refrigerated items. Notice small, wet footprints around the kitchen. Follow them to find Caedmon in the laundry room next to a jug of automobile washer fluid. Evidently, he can not only untwist standard caps off of containers, but also child-proof ones.
10:17 am : Finish "helping" Caedmon clean up the washer fluid with paper towels. Shove- I mean, escort- him into the backyard to play while I finish putting the groceries away.
10:22 am : After putting the last of the cereal in the pantry, listen carefully for the boys. Silence. Not good. Not good at all.
10:24 am : Find Atticus standing near the compost heap, which just so happens to be next to the door of the shed, where Caedmon is dumping gasoline from the small container we use to fill up the lawn mower. Caedmon- and the grass at his feet- is soaked. Acquire an instant headache from the nearly-visible gas fumes coming off of him.
10:26 am : Dump both the boys in the bathtub. Scrub vigorously. Dump their clothes in the washer.
10:35 am : Help boys get dressed.
10:45 am : Clean up post-bathtime mess in bathroom.
11:00 am : Feed boys lunch.
11:15 am : Laugh hysterically when Atticus asks why they have to go down for a nap early today.