Tuesday, March 20, 2012

No, I Do Not Also Hate Kittens, Puppies, and Frolicking Lambs

You know that photo I posted on here yesterday of my sweet little tulip buds?

That photo was taken last week before we left for a trip down south.  When we returned Sunday evening, I marveled at how much they had grown, clucking over them and pulling an errant weed here and there.

Yesterday morning, the boys and I headed into the backyard to play.  As I was making my rounds of the flowerbeds, I came to those tulips.  They were no longer six inches tall, and they were no longer green and pink and beautiful.

They had been chewed down, eaten by those irritating, disgusting, pagan RABBITS.

I hate rabbits.  I'm not going to sugarcoat it anymore.  No more, "Well, I just don't like the rabbits in my backyard.  I'm sure there are nice rabbits out there somewhere."  No more Watership Down.  No more God-loves-all-his-creatures-blah-blah-blah.  I'm done.

I was still stewing over all this as the boys and I went to Aldi yesterday.  After successfully completing our grocery shopping, we stopped by a local nursery so that I could peruse their vegetable seeds.

You know what I saw the second I walked in the door?

That's right.  Rabbits.

They had cages right inside the front door, taunting me.  Why on earth would a Garden Center have rabbits?  Wouldn't that be like a chocolaterie having a scale and a full-length mirror?  Or a library having DVD's?  (Oh, wait...)

A salesgirl quickly approached me, politely asking if I needed any help.

I got right to the point.  "Why do you have rabbits in here?"

"Well, some people like to buy them around Easter."

"Gardeners do?  You're telling me gardeners like to buy rabbits?"

(Nervous laughter) "I guess so."

Her obvious discomfort helped me snap out of it and put my I'm-in-public-so-let's-not-scare-people face back on.  She seemed very relieved when I asked her what kind of carrots they had.

I managed to make it through the rest of our visit to the store without incident, although Caedmon insisted on continually drawing my attention to the rabbits by pointing at them and saying, "Doggie?  Doggie?"

As we were leaving, Atticus wandered off a bit, distracted by a display of strange contraptions, right next to the rabbits.

"Mommy, what are those?"

I peered at the tags, then started laughing.  "Those are rabbit traps, Bud."

Maybe those garden center people know what they're doing, after all.


  1. =D
    No more Watership Down--tee, hee
    You're telling me gardeners like to buy rabbits? bwah, ha, ha
    "I'm in public so let's not scare people" face--giggle

    Thanks for this entertainment.

    1. I think they're living under our shed. I'm trying to decide how to get them out of there; maybe smoke them out? But how do I do that without setting the shed on fire?

      I'm obviously no hunting/trapping expert.

  2. Guess you missed the hunting/trapping gene that seems to be prevalent in our family.

    1. If I could just get Sherry to drive around our backyard in her car, they'd all be dead within hours.

  3. I heard that! actually, i was thinking that someone in my family would probably help you out with your critter problem. Justin borrowed Grandpa VS live animal trap because something is living under his shed and bothering Daisy. So its in winfield. A b.b. gun would also be handy.

    1. A live animal trap and b.b. gun sound like they add up to a fun teachable moment for our kids...

    2. yes, it would, one every child should learn the circle of life, you could even cook them for supper. fried rabbit tastes like chicken. really it does.

    3. yes it would, every child should have that experience, its the circle of life. you could even fry them up for supper. like real pioneers. Rabbit tastes like chicken, really it does!

  4. would you like to borrow the dog??????? She'd LOVE to chase rabbits in your backyard! and she'd pee all over and I think I heard that's a deterant (great,probably spelled that wrong...)for bunnies :)

    1. Does Ellie like to dig flowers? I know Caedmon would love to borrow her.

    2. Ellie's never dug our flowers.....so I'll say no but no guarantees....


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